The Down trip!

Its been around three and a half years that I posted a new blog here. its interesting for me at least, though my life had took very important turns in the past 4 years, I was never motivated to write, this time am writing on the same lines as the other posts, which I had last submitted 3 years ago.

I was traveling the Up route in my life between mid 2006 and mid 2007. Next one year was my sojourn at the destination. I thought I was going ahead in my life from there. But, I had to take my Bus back the same route. That was a familiar experience with same road, same halts, same bumps on the way. But this time I am sitting in the driver's seat. A paradigm shift in my thoughts about the journey from the last time. I started understanding the driver's concerns, situations and reasons for his reactions. I am sitting in the driver's seat. Nothing else would have made me realize it.

I know there are a lot of missing details which can make this complete for someone who is reading this. Bottom line's I am convinced, Not always the people who hurt you are not really hurting you. Its the reflections of the situation which make us believe we are being hurt intentionally. But it is not.

I am convinced that some situations can not be handled, they have to settle down with time. The more you try to handle the more you are making it turbulent. Leave it aside, take all the blame, it will calm down some time.

I am convinced that when you can't give back anymore, you are treated worse than the one who never gave anything.

I am convinced that I do make mistakes, very large mistakes, which no one would be ready to forgive, and still you expect to be forgiven, so should be others.

I am convinced, to be a good human, is nearly impossible. Being a true Human being is being nearly Godly. For, I am controlled by so many entities external to me, its impossible to remain a good human being. Trying to become a good human being in itself is being human.

I am convinced that forgiving from the bottom of the heart is much difficult than asking for forgiveness.

I am convinced that, being Good is different from doing Good. And Good is only a relative concept. Trying to arrive at an absolute definition is just impossible.

FRIEND!!!... a word losing its identity

Its Friendship Week!!

How many friends did u add to your list last Year. Hey sorry, not those friends on your Orkut list, where things happen on the decision of your finger tips, clicking an inch away makes or breaks a friend. Of course, am referring to those whom you value so much and they value you so much that they don’t want YOU to lose on any anything even at the cost of breaking your friendship..

Hmm anyways would u like to know some of the myths of this often casually used word “Friend”? Sooo casually used that someone whom you met few hours ago might introduce you as a FRIEND to his/ her so called Friends..

- Are those gangs of people whom you hang out with every day your friends?
- Is that stranger, whom you found more attractive and got close in a week, and kept hanging out/ exchanging messages/ phone calls, is he / she your friend?
- Are those people around you, who listen to all your angst and happiness all the time, when you feel like pouring out your expressions?
- Is that psychologist/ therapist who listen to all your problems?
- Is that person who stood by you at a difficult time and helped you out of a crisis?
- And are those strangers, whose kindness was so necessary that your so called friends had let you down?

How can someone be your friend just if you can’t confide in them? Or if it was just for the situations that you have got to meet them and share some time, how can they be your friends. Or someone, whom you pay to listen to all your angst and joy, can be a friend?

You can look back into your life, and find out all those so called friends, whom you considered the Best for the reason that they helped you out of a crisis and you now barely know what’s happening with him/her for the reason that your friendship had just lasted till you tide over the crisis.

Can you remember the Friends whom you considered for the reason you hang out/ go around so frequently, for, they are available freely all the time, and now you never like their acquaintance for the reason they don’t get along with your views and life style?

Do you remember that day, when you were in such a difficult situation, that you badly need someone’s support and a wise advice, your so called Best friend, for the reason you know them for long time, react so coldly and couldn’t empathize the way you need then.

Can someone be our friend just for the reason that you have a lot to share with?


Certainly not all these are your friends.

If you can look back into your life, you will see that sensible and practical person who stood by your side at the time of all your crises and to whom you had always turned to for his/her unbiased and helpful advice. He/she never put things evading and let you know the right way to do the things, so that you are respected and happy in the long run though it may hurt you for that moment. He/she would come back to you every time you have misunderstandings, and would like to go ahead with a fresh day so that you are back on the same lines. He/ she would always plan for your future well in advance to make sure that you never end up in problems. May be he/she was a bore to party/ dance with. He/she may not be that special to you as you feel when you meet someone once in a while. Sense of warmth and sharing and caring are what you exchange with this person but you never felt him a special friend for he is around everyday and your special ness is reserved for whom you have that instant attraction.

So do you know who your real friends are?

Here comes the question, do you get along with your friends forever, if not what is the time frame, and is it important to have a friend for life, or if he/ she is worth that?

Have you ever seen or experienced people who claim you or some one around you the best friend and had moved along, and now even doesn’t know your whereabouts? and considering someone else as the best friend? I mean, those people who have time frames and situations attached to Friendships?

It’s very common and you can make a good list of such ppl, if you can see around for a while. But what should have been the reason behind that behavior. Its an out of the scope question unless you were of that kind. For someone a best friend is some one who is along forever and for some one a best friend is someone who cares you so much and for someone a best friend is someone who is readily accessible and attractive. For some they are serious and committed and for some they are just plain words. But, what is the kind of reaction you have when you have to come across someone who considered you the best friend and now you are a complete stranger of course for that person is another best friend around? Take it for accepted, for, the meaning of friendship is different for different people..

So be sure you know what your friend considers the meaning of friendship as. And make sure that you are not in a situation that your friend sits beside you and you still could not talk the way it was once. This is the worst loneliness one can experience…
Make sure you don’t end up in a situation where the person who considered you the best friend had gone along with his/ her life and you still expect that old emotions from him/her. Choose your friends wisely, for the true friends are those who turn up at your funeral and certainly not those whom you party with, go out nights with, go on summer vacations and certainly not those with whom you exchange all those flirting messages ….

I did found my true friends and am happy and more than lucky to have these true people as my true friends… <ACIDS>….Did you find yours?..

Did you miss few of them from your list of Friends, for all those unknown misunderstandings... Did you move away from one of your Friends whom you felt was a true Friend, Do you miss him/ her really? its not too late.. wrap all that EGO in a tight polythene and quarantine while you go to your lost Friend and Greet a happy friendship day, a heart full hand shake or a hug... Your heart would be more than joyful, you will feel that great difference and ... So...come on..get ready walk to your friend/ pick up the phone and talk to your friend.....

Happy Friendship Week and Day

Dedicated to ACIDS and all my TRUE Friends…….

Killer Instincts!!!!!!!

It was when I had gone thru the local newspapers found
"A 25yr old person stabbed.........."

But the same kinda news
" Woman ends life in......"
"Teenager commits ssuicide after..."
" A Man kills her wife to............."
"Son kills father at...."
also appear so frequently on news papers.

I wondered how soemone whom you shared with most of the best moments in life, can be gunned down. I agreed with the existence of these crimes after I realised that we do have situations and meet people who act to the heights of insanity, that we often feel that it would be a better world for me if it/he/she will never exist. But, every time, these feelings or emotios are lost in the air after few seconds, once we are persuaded by our subconcious...

What would have happened if we also had gone insane and never looked back to have our subconscious act on its role at that moment...
What would have happened if the person never ceased to stop being insane taking the advantage of your calm.........

......Answer would be, I and You would have been on the news papers as one of the above..
I was trying to find out an answer how some thing can be done to avoid such a crime.. But even before I started to find the answers, I have started searching even more such crimes in the past news papers.

However more than 80% of the crimes are not committed by the so called criminlas, they are situation driven, more often the situations brought up by the victim out of his/ her insanity to make the subject person make the crime. (Unless the subject person is not psychologically ill.)

Most of the crimes confirm that the reasons for the crime are: being betarayed, experiencing disloyalty, shown unfaithfulness.
The words above are so commonly used that their meaning and context of usage convey nothing more than a simple sentence of general desciption. However the truth is that experiencing one of the above three situations to the heights would make one end others life.

Its simple, Every game has rules, So does the life. One would be inside the game untill he/she plays the game obeying the rules. once you don't care for those rules of life, you are out of the game, for which the whole nature around you and the situations around you will make it happen.


After knowing these facts
"Care for others feelings, empathise with the situations of the people around you. Listen to your subconscious with diligence. Live a life that would make life with you a harmony for people around you." is what i thought should help out.......

whats in an Impression!!!!!!!!

Impressions of foot prints left on the beach side sand ….

Impressions of name stamps left on papers …

Impressions of a die left on a work item ….

Impressions of a great leader left on the audience after an inspirational talk ……..

Impressions of a friend leaving for a far away place ….

Impressions of lost ones (dead n alive...) ….

Impressions some times seem to have very impressive implications.

Good or bad, physical or psychological, very often, we experience impressions left on us or around us everyday.

The magnitude and nature of impressions is the big point of concern when experiencing the implications of impressions.

Some Impressions are good n some are bad.

Some Impressions are light/ superficial and fade away soon.

Some Impressions are heavy/ deep and last forever.

It is the stand of the impressing entity which decides the magnitude and nature of the Impressions.

Let me explain…..

We all should have played in the sands on the beach side at some point of time in our life.

You remember, those impressions of your palm you realize when you press your hand over that wet sand.

Not every time the impression is so clear, so strong, so similar to yours …..

If you have just placed your hand over the sands, then, only a light impression should have formed which is wiped off with the lightest breeze and should have disappeared after some time.

If you have pressed your hands over the sands with thrust, then, a strong impression should have formed, which stands even to the moderate breezes. You should have refined the edges of your impression and made it a good sculpture over the sands and returned home when it turned to be dark out side.

See, that impression which had been wiped off in no time; we had lots n lots of occasions in our life where we had wiped off impressions of past incidents and people in no time after those incidents have occurred or we have passed off those people. Those incidents and people should have left over the lightest impressions over us, which have been wiped off in no time.

See, that impression which had stood even to the moderate breezes and you left over when it was dark. The next day when you walked down the beach you see that impression still standing over there. You stop there, feel happy that its still there, just check if the sculpture is not disturbed, reset those edges, and remove that extra sand accumulated by the breezes last night. You see that it is set as you wanted it to be.

And then just walk down after a while.

We definitely should have had at least a few occasions in our life, when we had recollected the impressions which were left over us long back. When we pass across those impressions as we did the next morning on the beach side we remember the past, feel happy when we realize the significance of that impression in our life, try to experience the same, if possible, which is now an impression.

Most of the everlasting Impressions and those which our mind and soul frequents are of that psychological kind.

If you hear the whistles of trains and just become nostalgic ‘bout your childhood play ground near the railway tracks.

If you see a person dressed in a safari suit and just remembers your Dad who passed away long back.

If you…….. You are experiencing the implications of psychological impressions.

Imagine what happens, if you are uncomfortable\ abnormal about experiencing the implications of Impressions when you have to walk across those strong impressions frequently; you either want to avoid going across those impressions or wipe off those impressions permanently so that they are never seen again and remind the past which makes you uncomfortable. But, what if those Impressions are of psychological kind which you cannot wipe off permanently as you can do with that sand sculpture which you visited next day and want it no more a lasting impression.

As I said initially “It is the stand of the impressing entity which decides the magnitude and nature of the Impressions.”

The “impressing” entity/ person leave impressions over the “impressed” entity/ person. It is the nature of the impressions left over by the impressing entity/ person which makes the experience of implications of Impressions memorable, enjoyable, worth savoring, uncomfortable, confusing, disturbing….

As can be understood, not all impressions make the impressed entity/ person happier and comfortable while experiencing the implications of Impressions when the “impressed” had to walk across those Impressions. These psychological impressions which can’t be wiped off permanently and make the “impressed” uncomfortable or disturbing together with its magnitude decide on what is on stand for the “impressed” in his life. If the “impressed” can stand those impressions with self awareness, every time he had to walk across those impressions then he can make his life a beautiful one. But rarely will it happen that filling oneself with an awareness which can dominate those undying impressions which frequents to a level where the thought of one impression is still live with lots of questions and the next impression has already come on ones way with a gamut of unanswered questions and the next is just ahead on his way looking blurred at a distance and posing more blurred questions and ………….

Here to share a thought. Hope you will take it.

So, let’s leave a strong impression on people around us, which would make them savor every impression we left over, with happiness and make them come by those impressions frequently to make themselves cheerful with joy even very long after we left them….

At least let’s not leave disturbing/ bad impressions on people around us. Its quiet natural to have few disturbances with people around us in the daily life, but it makes us more beautiful persons at heart if we can clear them and make good ones before we have to pass away (may be just from their lives or permanently leaving this world ) leaving an impression on them. Its definitely uncertain to say when one would pass away, so lets all leave good impressions on the people around us and make the implications of Impressions we left, more memorable for the “impressed”.

When an Impression is faked it’s even lighter than those impressions which fade away for the lightest breezes and can never be lasting impressions….

Dynamics of Relationships!!!!

Have you ever observed, rose petals falling off the flower.
Have you ever observed a wall poster peeling off the wall.
Have you ever observed a scholar leaving his high school for higher studies to some other place.
Have you ever observed an employee being honored with a farewell at your organisation.
Have you ever observed a Giant Join venture company failing to go together, and one of them taking over the other..
Have you ever observed a marriage falling apart which was promised to be forever.
Have you ever observed blood relatives estrange each other.
Have ever observed some one whom you know for quiet some time had passed away.

You should have defenitely experienced atleast one of these situations, first hand.
May be each of the above situations cited above are different in their being but they all share the same instance of a situation. Each of the above situations mark the instance "stop being together". The inviduals/ entities leaving apart share a relationship, which is different in each case. They are all different, some of the individuals/ entities described above are controlled by laws of nature, some by the laws of physics, and some by the psychologies; Yet all share the same dynamics in their life cycle of relationship. That is, the way they formed the relationship, the way they built the relationship being together, the way they grew/fall in the relationship, and the way they part away from the relationship.

Here are pieces of my work on the Dynamics of relationships:
Every relationship in this Universe has a purpose, and there is also a time frame attached to every relationship.

For example,
The relationship between a doctor and a patient is only till the illness is cured.

The relationship between a teacher and a student is only till the course of education is completed.

The relationship between a lamp and a person in darkness is only till the arrival of light..........

Every relationship has a purpose, as you can understand, what is the purpose of a patient as well as doctor to come together or the purpose of a teacher and student to come together. That is, a patient might have approached a doctor so that his illness is cured and a student has approached a teacher to gain knowledge. The doctor might have served patient for Remuneration or it may be his passion for service and same with the Teacher. Usually these relationships come into existence after a proper decision making by either entities/ individuals planning to get into a relationship. It means a patient finds out who is the best doctor for his illness; a student finds out details of the best teachers in his subject to get in touch with. Not often, it happens that these relationships are made without a thought...................

Each relationship has a time frame, which might had been decided before hand or decided by the situations the relationship grows/ falls into. Usually, the time frame is till the purpose has been served to either one or both the individuals involved in the relationship. Usually it happens that when one individual/ entity‘s purpose is served, the relationship is continued till the others’ purpose is also served; only in the case of self-interested individuals/ entities it may not happen, who leave the relationship once their purpose is served..........

However there are relationships which don’t have a purpose but has another characteristic called Passion (there are more of this kind characteristics which are described in detail in other places of the book) which decides the time frame and the dynamics of relationship. When a relationship is bound by Passion, it is taken to be an open ended or eternal relationship. These relationships driven by Passion also do have a purpose, but these purposes have a forward orientation. To put it more clear, in the example of doctor and patient relationship, they both have purposes which benefit them back which is oriented back to each one of them, but in the case of the Passion driven relationships, the purpose is to benefit (may be give comfort, give happiness, give support) to the other individual/ entity in the relationship.........

The time frame may be sometimes uncertain, In the case of death of an individual due to accidental reasons, it is true that the relationship is no more live. (although few types of relationships which are committed on emotional and psychological lines will not agree on this point, but it is true that realistically the relationship has ended due to the law of nature.)............................ more

Frendz, the work above is only based on my thoughts aroused after different experiences and the message may be different for different individuals.